Good Evening!
We are sitting here, listening to the Republican National Convention. I don't dabble in politics often (Brandon does that enough for both of us), but it is interesting to hear the perspectives of those that are speaking. I am excited about a woman running on the McCain ticket. I look forward to hearing her speak tonight.
This week has been a good one. Brandon and I took a trip to Chicago over Labor Day weekend. The time without the kids was so nice. It was great for us to be able to rest, relax, shop, and eat on our own schedule. We took in some of the sights of the city, slept in, and ate ourselves into oblivion. The kids spent time with Grandpa and Grandma McKinney in Baldwin, and, despite spending three days there, Kylee still cried when it was time for her to come home with us. They had a blast over the weekend, too.
Friday was a difficult day as we learned that baby Gabriella Duffet, at 55 days old, passed away. We have come to know Gabriella's family through Alexandra's House. Gabriella was born on July 5th and had Trisomy 18. As I mentioned in a previous post, she defied the odds by being here on earth with us for as long as she was. As her Daddy said on their family blog...Gabriella sprouted her wings and went to heaven....on August 29th. It brought back many painful memories of losing Caden, and, again, the question "Why must anyone endure this kind of pain?" We may never know. Of course, our love, thoughts, and prayers continue to be with the Duffett family. Please include them in your prayers as well.
Saturday was the two month anniversary of Caden's birth. I felt funny and then realized what day it was. I often find that my heart tells me when an anniversary date is approaching even if I don't consciously realize what the date is. I was grateful that we were doing something fun together. It made the day more bearable.
I am finding more peace as the days go by. There isn't a day that I don't miss our baby, but time is healing our wounds. Life is moving forward. Brandon and I talk about Caden often. The kids are doing well...Kylee hasn't had any more meltdowns, although she still looks at the baby stuff in Target with sad eyes. Above, you see her wearing her napkin on her head at dinner. Look out, Little Red Riding Hood!
We are picking up the pieces and finding our new normal. I have found that I speak of Caden in normal conversation as one of our children, which, of course, he is. Sometimes it catches people off guard, but it feels good to say his name. Some inquire about him when I mention his name, and it gets easier to share his story each time we do it. As we share our story, we have found that many people open up and share their own story of loss. It is humbling and soothing all at once. Many have looked at Caden's picture in our entryway and commented on how beautiful he was. We agree. :)
On Saturday, our friends will be here planting flowers and shrubs in Caden's garden. We are excited to see it all come together. We will dedicate the garden in just two weeks...another step in the healing process for us. We will post pictures when it is finished.
We are so grateful to have a garden full of living, beautiful things to help us memorialize our baby boy. Thank you so much to all of you who have helped bring the garden into being.
We continue to appreciate your love, thoughts, and prayers. Keep them coming!
4 comments:
Hi Lindsey,
I am so glad to hear that you and Brandon were able to get away for a little "grown up" time. And as a grandma myself, I can assure you that we have as much fun watching the kids as you do getting a break from them. It is all good!!! I wish I could be there Saturday and help with planting in Cadens garden. Wow, can you believe it is September already? It is going to look so beautiful when it is complete and growing. Such a wonderful place to relax and reflect. I will be praying for Gabriella's parents and family. Loss is never easy no matter how short or long the time given is. I know her little life touched many, just as Cadens continues to do. He is a beautiful little boy Lindsey and I can only imagine how you miss him more with each passing day. My prayers continue for your healing to be as gentle as possible. This Saturday will be special once again as you are reminded of how much you all are loved by those who labor there in the garden. I will be with you in spirit:) I love you guys and pray for healing, moment by moment. Oh, and Kylee is just too cute in that picture. I love that smile and those little hands!!
Love and Hugs, Laurie in Ca.
That picture of Little Red Riding Hood is adorable. I did a little audible aaaww when I saw it. :)
I used to feel awkward mentioning Jael in conversation because it seemed that people weren't sure how to respond and I didn't like making people feel weird. Then I realized that mentioning her name is natural and it often times sparks just the conversation that the person needed to learn about Christ.
Talking about her the way moms talk about all of their living children has allowed me so many witnessing opportunities that I would have otherwise not had. I don't hesitate anymore. I love to tell people about her and how much richer my life and faith are because of her!
Keep telling people about Caden, you never know who needs to hear about him and your God! Besides, what better bragging rights does any mother have than that her child is sitting at the throne of God?!
Many blessings this week, can't wait to see the pictures of the garden!
I so glad to hear that everyone is doing well! I'm also glad that each day gets a little easier for you and you're able to speak of Caden. He's a special boy, but no more special than his brother and sister. You have been blessed with a beautiful family and I know you know that! :) As always, you are all in my prayers and I truly admire your strength and faith. I will add Gabriella's family to my prayers. I wish so many people didn't need our prayers, but God is there for them and he'll help them through. Take care and hope to see you at church!
Karla
Hi Lindsey,
Just stopping in on this Saturday afternoon thinking about you guys and the beauty that is going on in Caden's garden today. The spirit in that garden must be extra sweet today with the loving labor going on. I am really looking forward to seeing the pictures once you post them. I am with you in spirit today. May your day be blessed!!!
Love, Laurie in Ca.
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